Category: Blog

We are all familiar with the Dirty John series. I have my own Dirty John story but substitute the name John for Carl. And in my story John (Carl) doesn’t die. But the ending in my story may wish he was John. Two years ago tonight we met for the last time over a 2 year period. I will try to put this in the smallest nutshell possible. We met in the spring of 2016 while I was in Atlanta on a work trip. I was there from Los Angeles, he was there for work from North Carolina. We both met at the hotel bar, connected with huge magnetism and conversation and he was adamant about flying me out to NC after this work trip. He was charming, simple, loved the good things in life, paid me attention and went to church every Sunday. Oh, and supposedly divorced. So a couple months later, after talking daily, I make it out there. Let me stress however that he did not fly me out there. I flew myself out there. I had another work trip in the vicinity and made the detour happen myself. He picked me up at the airport about 2 hours late and wasn’t phased as to why I was a little upset. He had errands and kids for crying out loud. When we ended up having to stay at a hotel and not his house I got suspicious. I got even more suspicious that he couldn’t even stay the full night as he had to get back to his daughter. Don’t get me wrong, kids always should come first. But if you’re not available for a weekend then don’t make plans with me. Oh, I was there for 2 nights and he asked for my credit card to pay for the second night. The same night where he disappeared and left me all by myself for the rest of the trip. I came back to Los Angeles and was done. This guy is married and had no business having me come out to visit, even if he did insist. So although I asked what was going on and got vague answers I decided I had to end these shenanigans. Fast forward a year. He calls me around my birthday. He said he couldn’t stop thinking about me and wanted to see me. I thought wow, this guy got his shit together. So, he wanted to see me again and asked to meet halfway, perhaps in Austin. I was in a good place in life so said sure. Lots of time had passed. He’s changed. Hahahahaha. Well, Austin changed to Charleston, South Carolina. “I have a friend’s daughters graduation, meet me there!”. Hmmm, OK. I’ve always wanted to go there. So I get to SC and we check into the hotel. It’s pouring rain. We drive down the street to grab a quick drink before the graduation. He drops me off so I don’t have to walk in the rain while he parks. He proceeds to tell me he’ll be back in a few hours after the graduation. To which I replied “oh, I’m not invited??!!” He said it was just a short thing and he’d be right back. So here I am, at a beautiful hotel bar. The people around me plus the staff all witnessed what had just happened. I proceeded to fill them in and said I did not just fly across the country to sit at a hotel bar by myself while this man I liked wandered off. They, along with me, saw the bs. A couple hours later he called me to say he was on his way back. I told all my new friends and bartenders to be quiet once he returned. Hilarious. I told all of them this was it. I will just have a great time, explore this new city and chalk it up to a great weekend. So, he came back, I was upset and he apologized up the you-know-what. All his friends told him she didn’t fly across the country for you to just let her sit on her own. He couldn’t apologize enough. Then treated me like a queen the rest of the weekend. We spent the next day bike riding, shopping, going to farmers markets, going out to eat, you name it. We had great dinner, drinks and amazing conversation. We had an amazing connection. The next day, Sunday, I was flying out from Charlotte, his home town, and about a 3 hour drive. I’d had a great weekend. He made up for me being upset. All was good. Then he left the hotel room to go move the car across the street so he wouldn’t get a ticket. And the phone in the hotel room rings. I pick it up. No answer. Again. And again. Five times. On the sixth time a girl finally responds after my sixth “hello”? “Hi, is Carl there?” No, he just left to go move his car, can I take a message? “No” she says and hangs up. First of all who calls hotel rooms anymore when we all have cell phones? I’m pissed. I’m packing up my stuff thinking how can I be in the car with him for 3 hours to get to the airport? Ugh. He comes back to the room and asks “hey, wanna go grab breakfast before we head back to Charlotte”? Without an answer to that I said hey, some girl kept calling the room asking for you. He said “Oh, that’s weird, I just talked to her outside”. Said it was some crazy girl he used to date but he cut it off because she was married. Ha. I asked why do you two still talk then and he said it was because she is a good business lead. Keep in mind I’m not stupid. So we head back to the airport and I couldn’t wait to get out of the car. He was trying so hard to be nice and explain himself. Did I say he was smooth??? I came home and just blew it off. But over the next few months he tried to brush that off and make things good with me. We even went on more trips. Then he even had a reason to come out to California as he had a son that was starting college here. So he’d come stay here, take my car to see him but not take me with him. Did I mention I’m not stupid?? Wifey was out here too. I knew it but went along with the shenanigans. He claimed to be not with her and “we don’t sleep in the same bed.” “Lauren you’re crazy!!!!” he would say. So the last engagement with him was 2 years ago today. He texted me “Let’s meet in Nassau on Friday”. He has a time share there. One that apparently he goes to frequently with his family. You know, the lady he’s not married to anymore and their kids. So I played along and said sure. Again, he did not fly me out there. I bought my own ticket. So it’s only a two hour flight for him. For me it’s all day. I stopped in Miami. Called him from my layover telling him I’m in Miami and STARVING. I haven’t eaten all day and all restaurants in the airport are closed. Ugh!! I land in Nassau. He didn’t pick me up because he was at the Casino on the property. So I get my own taxi ride there and after I arrive he wanders back from the casino to come meet me in the lobby. We get to the room and no food. I was starving and everything was closed. He had no food for me so I ate the cookie in my purse that I happened to have from my flight. Did I not say enough times how hungry I was? Ugh, So, the weekend was fine but I paid for everything. He couldn’t leave a paper trail for obvious reasons. He had left many times on occasion to talk on his cell phone and buy his self some food (not me). I got it. This was my proof. So I get on the airplane to fly back and some man sits next to me on the plane. VERY talkative. He friends me on Instagram but warns me that he has a jealous wife who might give me shit later for friending him. Really? Surely enough, after traveling all day to get home I get an anonymous email from “Bahama Man” saying he had a great time meeting me on the Island, when can I see you again? I asked who it was and got evasive answers. I assumed it was that guy’s crazy wife and if she couldn’t identify herself then leave me alone. She kept emailing and I ignored. Then I kept getting more emails from a bunch of different email addresses and they all got deleted. A couple months later Carl texts me to please take all photos off of social media. And then sends me an audio recording asking me to take it off Facebook. I listened to it. I did NOT put this on Facebook!!! It was the guy on the airplane (with the supposed crazy wife) recording our whole conversation. Yes, he was a private investigator. He paid for the seat next to me to ask me about my trip. And ask about myself . He asked about Carl. He told me to get rid of him. Then recorded the whole conversation to send to Carl’s wife. Carl tells me I have one hour to remove our pictures from all social media before he reports it to proper authorities. Hahaha. I said nope. It’s social media. Report this to whoever you want. And Carl had previously said I’ll just tell people I met you randomly in the Bahamas. To which I said really? Should I also post the text where you said “meet me in Nassau”? He never gave me answers. I asked him several times, “Are you still married”????? His response was always “you’re too amped up. I can’t have this conversation now.” The perfect gaslighter. Let me add, this was an amazing private investigator. The night he dropped me off at the Charlotte airport after out weekend in Charleston, he was photographed at that girls house (who called our hotel room) three hours later. He dropped me off at 2:30. He was timestamped at the other girls house at 5:30. And the P.I. sent me all the photos to prove it. How did this end? Well, honestly, it ended at the beginning. But he blocked me when he figured out I knew it all. I told him all he had to do was come clean but he wouldn’t. So he is still married. It’s cheaper to keep her so he’d rather lie and cheat and put on his little show. The sad thing is that he is an example to two children. He’s a dad who cheats on his wife with multiple women and lies about it. I hope his son doesn’t follow in his footsteps and I hope his daughter never meets a man who does this to her.